Sunday, January 14, 2018

A Personal Post

Please indulge me as I write this very personal post....

When an obituary doesn't tell the whole story:

On Christmas day I received a phone call from my nephew that my brother had passed away in his sleep. His death was sudden and with no warning. Time stood still and I didn't know if I could catch my breath from the shock.

You see, Jimmy had always been a part of my life, at 57 I didn't know a life without having this older brother that I looked up to. We had lost our other brother, Karl, in 1984 in a car accident. When there were three, we were down to I am just one.

I found this picture of the three of us...1963/64...the cat, Waldo, is being held by Karl and if you'll notice Jimmy is in a cast..I'm sure there is a story behind that and my mother will be able to fill that in.

Let me tell you about Jimmy that his obituary didn't.

First of all..he was he got older I'm sure he tried to go by Jim, but that was always dad, he was Jimmy. As kids our grandparents called him Jimmy Jr.

He was a son, brother, husband, father and grandfather..and so much more..friend..he was one hell of a friend. If a friend called and he needed something, anything, he dropped what he was doing and helped them out. Everyone in our small hometown of Havelock knew Jimmy and to be honest he really was the unofficial mayor of the town.

He had a laugh..if only we had a recording of that laugh. He would crack himself up as he told a joke and you couldn't tell if you were laughing at his joke or laughing because he was laughing. He wanted people to laugh and be laugh he did.

Jimmy played baseball and football and surfed growing up. He turned to the water as an adult and fished and boated with his friends and family.

Jimmy so loved his high school sweetheart he married her twice.

Jimmy was frugal..okay..maybe he could be cheap..but he would work his finger to the bones for you. We joked about how cheap he was and he took it all in stride..he knew, we knew and it was all a part of who he was.

This post was written through tears but with smiles and a few see Jimmy would not want anyone sitting around crying over his death but instead he would want people to share stories about who he really was because like I obituary doesn't tell the whole story.

So I will cherish the memories I have of him...and I will laugh when I think of some of those memories...and I will live my life as he would want me to..with laughs and smiles.

I will leave this post with a picture I shared on Facebook the day he passed. You see our smiles...and now the joke with this picture and has my mother cracking up..the boys got musical instruments and I got a hat!

Until next time my friends
Be Kind

Kelly Ann


  1. I know the pain of losing a brother. I lost my oldest brother at age 50 to cancer. It was almost 18 years ago, but sometimes it feels like yesterday. May joyful memories ease the ache in your heart somewhat. Big hugs to you.

    1. Very joyful memories. I've been running this post over and over in my head and heart for days, so glad I could put my words down for all to see. I am sorry that you also experienced the pain of losing a brother..our brothers helped mold us to who we are. Hugs back to you.

  2. A profound loss and loving sympathy and prayers to you and your family.

  3. What a lovely, heartfelt tribute to your brother. It is obvious was a wonderful man he was and how important he was to you. I pray you and your family find Peace in memories of you all together. Love you!

    1. The memories are strong and deep with my love for him.

  4. Beautifully written! I am so sorry for your loss! May God comfort you and your family.

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  6. Kelly Ann - my older (8 years) brother passed away 2 years ago. I miss him SO much. You wrote beautifully about your brother. I'm sending you (((hugs))) and love and consolation and prayers and more (((hugs))) because when this happens, there are never enough. Despite the age difference between my brother and I, we were very much alike, and even though we have an older brother (10 years), he wasn't on the same page and me and Mike. Take care of yourself. It's very, very difficult to move through this and I still find myself teary now and then over the loss of my brother, who also had a wonderful, contagious laugh.

  7. Kelly Ann,

    I am so sorry for your loss and I cannot imagine the moments you are having since he passed. I will keep you in my thoughts and prayers. ~JanL~


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